It’s one of the most observed issues surrounding tall women: Should you date significantly shorter men?
Personally, I’ve never bothered to read those articles in the past as I don’t recall a time when I have ever been attracted to a much shorter man. AT 6ft2, I’ve had dalliances with men of 5ft10 and possibly 5ft9 when I was a teenager, and I’ve dated men of 5ft11, 6ft and 6ft1 far more than I’ve dated men of 6ft5 and above but what about proper ‘short’ men? It’s never really crossed my mind, until last weekend….
Following a friend’s party on Saturday, I’m now racked with a gigantic schoolgirl crush on one of the sexiest men I think I’ve ever met. He was so much fun, so hot I nearly fainted and had a body that could make you think that skinny dipping in the Thames in November was a great idea (don’t worry, we didn’t). And to be honest, it wasn’t so much a case of ‘You had me at hello….’ like the movies, since his first words were ‘F*!k me, you’re f*****g massive’ (a line usually guaranteed to ensure the cold shoulder from me all evening). However, when he was maybe 5ft7 and I’m 6ft5 in my heels, he might have had a point.
Short man/tall woman couples are all over the media, even more so since Sophie Dahl started dating Jamie Cullum. So, why are shorter men attracted to tall women who only accentuate their lack of stature?
Several studies have investigated whether height is a major factor of attractiveness to the average man and almost all of them have found that it is definitely not . Whilst supermodels are almost always over 5ft9, singers and film stars are often far from statuesque. Much of the earlier research seems to suggest that tall women are not more physically attractive than their shorter friends but are perceived as more glamorous and prestigious.
Therefore, to the extent that tall women are preferred as mates, it is probably so that the man can show her off as a hard-to-acquire status symbol, like a Lamborghini. If you’re honest with yourself, you know that when you see a shorter man with a very tall girlfriend or wife, you do wonder just who the hell he is or what he has. It is possible that broadcasting his status in this way may also allow him to be taken more seriously by his male colleagues, friends and inferiors, and so to rise further in status: “Hey, that guy has a 6′ tall wife — he must be a real go-getter”. And more importantly, parading around your tall wife is a far less vulgar signal of status than, for example, driving up in an obscenely expensive car or sporting tons of jewellry. Consequently, the man does not suffer a loss of reputation as he would with those other signals, and because it is less conspicuous, he is less likely to draw the jealous scorn of those around him. He will provoke class envy in them, for sure.
I was lucky enough to be sent to Monaco yesterday for my day job and I bizarrely ended up at a dinner party with 15 of the most beautiful, supermodel-thin, tall women and 5 older, very successful and much shorter men. The men were more than enthusiastic about their taller wives and girlfriends and explained that it was almost the norm in Monaco and many have only dated women who were much taller than themselves. It seems the notion of tall women as a status symbol is definitely a reality.
So, the question still stands, do I choose to pursue a man significantly shorter than me? Or am I too tall for him? Maybe, as he’s not an international financier, film star or Formula 1 boss, he doesn’t find tall women attractive and doesn’t need the status boost. As he’s not wealthy or famous (and those things have never been attractive to me), I’m guessing that I experienced proper sexual chemistry and, alas, I don’t think there’s a cure for it.
Now, can someone just pop round and explain to him that I’m the next best thing to a Lamborghini except I’m more affordable and I handle better than a Murcielago….
